Wednesday, December 21, 2005
it's true.
they say haplessness can cause your insides to wrench, hopelessly.
it's true.
Long ride home mixed with baffling emotions,
confusing feelings and weird folk tales of
Living woman turning into stone,
Man meeting ghost of his living wife,
Two women facing up to their childhood fears
A.S. Byatt doesnt help much.
When a better world is shown,
Going back is never easy.
When troubles and nightmares are far away,
Coming back breaks my heart,
Because, the time has come again to
sink
into the same old ever embracing darkness.
posted at [9:26 PM]
Thursday, December 08, 2005
hello, today is a sad day for all Manchester United fans. Well, they got kicked out of the champion league. I just know the press are going to have a field day criticising them.
Sometimes i dont really enjoy watching soccer matches. especially before any of the teams step onto the field. You'll see supporters for both teams cheering madly, waving their team logo and name proudly into the air. Or you see some supporters, pointing at their team shirts with eyes sparkling and with so much vigour. Then when it comes back to me sitting at home, i dun feel very happy. becos we all know tt in soccer matches, only one team will win and only one side of the supporters will leave the stadium happy and the other disappointed and sad. and so what does this shows? that maybe we should live life in moderation and not act toooooo optimistic. because you never know when you will fall back to earth again and for the bunch of away fans at the benfica home ground today, it must have hurt a lot. a lot.
to give a summary of the whole game, I feel sorry for Ruud Van Nistelrooy. Our RVN is a great player. but then watching him in recent games, it's as if our dear rvn has been led on to think tt he is a GREAT player who has the magical touch. With all the hype surrounding him, he himself has hyped up his own ability, thus thinking that he is untouchable. And it is a sad sight seeing him trying to chase after the ball after every passes just because he cant seem to get the ball or he likes going around in circles with the ball instead of doing something constructive. Looking at Rooney, fouled-mood and vulgar near the dying minutes of the game made it worse. Sometimes i wonder how many times he blames the inability of his fellow team mates for their lousy scores this season. Did Ferguson make a wrong choice in choosing Gary Neville as captain? I sure think he did. Yes, he's one of the most senior players. But look at his passes today, it was hardly accurate and i did not see any inspiration to push the team on at all, unless you count the last part where he patted RVN's back when they were walking back into the tunnel as something a captain will do. Like what Abu said, it was certainly a torture watching them lose. And the alarming thing is that the pain and anguish that comes with each game that they lose are gradually growing into a heavy hearted accceptance. like as if, oh, man utd lost again? well it's sth tt's expected. Something needs to be done to this once beautiful team.
Soccer is very much a game that showcases the emotions of human beings. from immense faith and belief and to a certain extent, self deception that your favourite team WILL win before the match from the supporters, to dividing into 2 parties, one jubilant and screamingly happy, the other one despondent and disappointed. from having the future of the club weighing onto each and every player when they stepped out of the tunnel, to joy at scoring the goals, to pain from being tackled, to desperation to feel the need to use play acting antics to waste your opponents time (benfica, im talking abt you), to anger and helplessness showing in the extra minutes of the game in the man utd players. it is certainly the beautiful game that has men all over the world enticed.
there are losers and winners in every game. many a times we only concentrate on the winners and we neglect the losers. yes some of you may think that because they are the losers, they dont deserve anything. but that is wrong. losers are just the same as the winners. they have feelings too and it's not a nice feeling losing. sometimes i dont understand why man kind likes to put themselves into competitive situations. it's highly engaging for the viewers and extremely satisfying for the winners. but is this all there is to life? because sometimes, life is not about winning or losing. there are so much more things to life, but in our capitalist world, sadly, i guess we will never see the other things that i myself have yet to fully realise too. all of us are just being sucked into this gigantic vacuum where we are becoming self centred, selfish and we neglect other ppl's emotions and where money rules the world. We are all just becoming cold hearted.
will there be an end to this?
posted at [11:44 AM]
Thursday, December 01, 2005
guess what? many a times, people tend to prefer to live in their own deluded world. where they see just what they wanna see, do what they wanna do. and they just block out things they dun like. a.k.a. running away from the truth and facts of life.
i dun get it. why the heck sometimes ppl like to ask "why?" and "why?" AND "why?". cant u just accept it? what's wrong with acceptance? is it not in ur dictionary? come on man. sometimes we need to make peace with ourselves. if you're not happy abt it, then dun just act like u wanna die. go do sth pls. stop being so soft.
the type of why is not like charlene tan's type of "why". curiosity is understandable but if i tell u sth, and u keep on asking me/ probing into the matter, it's not tolerable to me. if someone gives u ambiguous answers, there probably is a reason. and i hate it when ppl ask "why" in an accusing tone. like "oh.. you're ____ing this or that is it?". like it's my fault. then to pacify u i'll go, yeah yeah ok ok. it's my fault.
p.s. tt's just to shut ppl up.
just stop it. u may think u have the last laugh, but im the one with the upper hand. haha.
anyway, thanks to my friends for going roller blading with me today. i really had a fantastic time with u guys. yes capitalism bugs all of us. so what do we do now? accept it ? eradicate it? haha. and why must everything be in beef! so not fair. i'm still dejected over the deprivation of being able to enjoy the mushroom burger. argh. haha.
posted at [10:57 PM]